Can you ever have it all as a Working Mum?

August 27, 2012 at 3:07 PMCoombeMill

Do you try to balance it all?
Balancing work and family life

Successful career, the breadwinner or income boost to make family life easier, however much you do or don’t enjoy the day job, keeping enough time and energy for a demanding family too is a hard juggling act. Wether you are a working Mum now or considering going back to work, here are my tips on "having it all"

The kids come first

Child care is the number one thing to be comfortable with as a working Mum. The guilt we give ourselves at not being with our children can best be managed by the reassurance that they are in fact safe and happy.

If you are lucky enough to have helpful, loving, local parents who choose to help out, then use them! I have never been in that position and relied on a nanny or nursery until school age. Looking back now I can safely say that both were a huge help in the development of my children and I really don’t feel they suffered from not having me around, but I do feel I missed out on a level of involvement with them.  

If anyone suffered it was me! When I finally gave up corporate life and moved to the country to run our own family business, I had never so much as bought a pair of shoes for my eldest son, by then age 4! That may sound crazy, but I worked eleven hour days and the nanny just shopped when they needed something. 

For working Mums to work at their best, there is nothing more important than knowing they have childcare they trust and believe in. I was only there at weekends for my first two children, but they don’t love me any less than my later four and have no strange social hang ups from my absence. I may have felt I missed out, but I knew they were happy.

Be realistic at work

Placing too much pressure on your self is the worst stress. In work, decide what is possible to achieve, what needs to be done and when you need to leave. Objectives that you can’t deliver against will leave you stressed when you get home and on the wrong footing for the family.

Make sure what you do is manageable and enjoyable, for your family's sake.  In a large organisation I was always the mug, happy to take on more to further my career. I can now see I took that burden home with me, which meant my quality family time was marred by worries of work.

In our own family business I have learned, with age and wisdom, to park work and enjoy family time. It is something I have had to teach myself to do, but I know that my family deserve it and appreciate it. I still feel I work too much, but I enjoy what I do and now have more flexibility to work around the children, and this was a huge part of our decision to change career and take on Coombe Mill as a family business. Now the children are growing up, they can also see that helping me and their Dad frees up everyone’s time and earns them pocket money too.  

 

Helping out on change over dayHelping Daddy build the play boatHelping bottle feed the lambs in Spring

 

Kids want your time more than presentsHaving fun with the kids in the woods

Be careful as a working Mum of falling into the trap of gifting to forgive not being there. Easy to say, but much harder to avoid, I have done it myself. But actually what children want is your undivided attention when you are with them and to do things together. Whether it is a walk in the woods, building a camp fire together, indoor crafts or baking it really doesn’t matter, the focus on them does. You have less time with them as a working Mum - make that time count with fun activities you all enjoy.

 

Make time for you!

We are all human and we all need a break.

Mummy's only boarding morning

 

I love my kids, my husband and I am passionate about my business, but I can still selfishly take time out to do the things I enjoy! I love sport and if nothing else will squeeze in a half hour run or cycle most days. A meal out with Daddy alone gives us both a chance to unwind and discuss our children, plan and talk business in peace and the odd girls' trip is also a must for me.  I am infact off tomorrow for a Spa day and night with friends. Time out gives me a chance to appreciate what I have, and makes me a better mother and more committed to our family business. 

 

  

You can have it all!

I am now convinced that "having it all" is a state of mind; you can have it all as long as your expectations allow it! Be realistic about what is achievable at home and at work, accept that there are compromises to make and do the ones that sit best with you and your family. Recognise what is right in your life, praise your self for all you achieve and be positive about the compromises you choose to make.

This is my recipe for being content as a working Mum and ensuring a happy family life balance. 

I am sharng this post with Ness at Always Be a Friend where she invites you to share real life stories.

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Silent Sunday / Project 52

August 26, 2012 at 12:00 AMCoombeMill

Sunday Photo of the Week

 

Fun at the beach

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Country Kids from Coombe Mill

August 25, 2012 at 12:00 AMCoombeMill

A huge family gathering at Coombe Mill!

I love a big family gathering and this week we have had just that! A real mix of 3 generations from both Nick's family and mine have been staying at Coombe Mill this week. It has been wonderful to all catch up together, the children have had cousins to play with all day and night and meal times with 18 have been relaxed and sociable for all. Having our new indoor BBQ has proved really handy, though there is no sharing with our holiday guests when we all squash in! Not strictly outdoor, but so very close in the middle of a field with the children coming and going, the smell of the bbq cooking and the sound of the river swishing through. 

 

Indoor BBQ with the extended family

 

Sun Shine and the Beach....

To add to a wonderful family mix we have been blessed with some of our best summer weather this year and have made the most of it with 4 days at the beach. There is no pretending that packing up so many for a beach trip complete with picnic is anything but a major operation, but it has been worth it for the hours of fun with rock pools, sand and surf down at New Polzeath beach. I am so hoping the lovely weather hangs on in there for the last week of the school holidays too!

 Surf, sand, sun and fun.......

 

Beach fun at Polzeath

 

Beach fun at Polzeath

 

Joining In

Please come and link up with your outdoor adventures this week. Whatever you have been up to, if it involves some fresh air and fun for the children it is perfect for Country Kids.  Grab the badge, join the fun and take a peep at a few others for more outdoor inspiration. 

Country Kids from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

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Spontaneous Raspberry Ice Cream & Jam

August 21, 2012 at 9:39 AMCoombeMill

Raspberries Galore

We finally took the children Raspberry Picking a couple of weeks back. We missed the strawberry season but the kids were quite happy to go for raspberries instead. It was a lovely afternoon and reminded me how much fun children can have with the simplest of days out, it is just being together with Mum and Dad when we are not working that really matters to them. 

Faced with 5 punnetts of raspberries at the end of the afternoon we had a discussion on the way home abut what to make with them. Cakes and meringue were discarded in favour of Ice cream and Jam. In true kid style there was not a moment to lose when we arrived home, it was hand washing and straight into checking the cupboards for ingredients. I figured on a quick inspection had we had enough to cobble some recipes together:

Ice Cream IngredientsIngredients for raspberry ice cream

2 punnets of Raspberries (aprox 1kg).

2 450g tins of Sweetened condensed milk.

1/2 tub of low fat creme fresh.

1 tub of Greek yoghurt.

Method

Place all ingredients into the blender and whiz well.

Decant into plastic containers.

Place in freezer.

Remove and re whiz after about 2 hours when just beginning to set, then return and leave over night.

 Opening the tins of condensed milkHelping pour ingredients into the blenderHelping pour ingredients into the blender

I was very brave at this stage and allowed the children to place everything in themselves, just a minor "slop" to clear up!

They all took it in turns to press "go" on the blender and felt very involved in what was essentially a really simple process!

We made 3 ice cream tubs full and the children are delighted with the result!

 Blending ingredientsAll watching!

Ice cream ready for freezingIce cream Cornets!  Ice cream Cornets!

Jam Ingredients

500g packet of granulated sugar.

1 500g punnett of raspberries.

Juice of 1/2 a lemon.

Method

Melt sugar and raspberries over a medium heat with a dash of water.

Bring to the boil stirring continuously.

Test if the jam is ready by pouring a little on a cold plate to see if it begins to set. (approximately 5 minutes). 

 Raspberries and sugarCookingJam forming

We made 2 good size jars and it is absolutely delicious, especially as Cornish Cream Tea with homemade scones and clotted cream, or simply spread on my homemade bread. definitely good uses of our raspberry haul! the last 2 punnets the children ate as DIY raspberry Sundae that evening!

 

Jar of homemade jamSpread on homemade breadCornish Cream Tea!

 

Roll on blackberry picking, just another week to ripen fully down here in Cornwall! 

 

Linking up with The Crazy Kitchen Photo Friday

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Silent Sunday / Project 52

August 19, 2012 at 12:00 AMCoombeMill

Photo of the week

 

Muddy Piglet Cuddles

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Please share our family farm holidays, I'd be so proud

Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

Coombe Mill

"Tales from the farmers wife" shares the funny and interesting happenings on our lovely holiday farm with Farmer Nick and our 6 children. A behind the scenes look on balancing family, farming, the holiday business and cooking for all. 


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Multiples Mayham Carnival

Multiples Mayham Carnival

December 3, 2012 at 9:39 AMCoombeMill

Grab yourself a cuppa and cake then settle in for a good read!

I am delighted to be hosting my first ever Carnival and even more delighted that it should be the amazing Multiples Mayhem. I find multiple parents very supportive and full of helpful hints and tips for handling all the wonderful and worrying things that parenting brings our way. I needn't have feared about you seeing my call for posts, thanks to all the retweets and shares from you the message clearly worked its way round the blogosphere and I have a wonderful collection here; so pull up a chair, grab yourself some quiet time and settle down for a lovely read. 

Multiples Mayhem from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

Over to you:


Some Questions to Answer:

Debbie at Johnson Babies asks us for some advice on one to one time with her twins. Looks to me as a working Mum she is doing an amazing job right now, but I'm sure she would appreciate your views on her dilemma as her delightful twin boys reach two.

The school play and unequal parts for her twins leaves Anthea of Blue Bear Wood feeling proud and guilty all at once. How would you handle this one?

What sparks off a tantrum with your toddler? Rebecca from Here Comes the Girls shares what sets her girls off and how frustrating it can be on a school morning!

Suzanne from Mummy to Twins asks us for some hair styles for her girls, personally I love what she has created for them in her post, but can you add some more funky, practical and cute suggestions?

Karen from Tales of a Twin Mum  tells the journey of her twin boys accepting a baby sister on the scene. Have you got any advice to offer as she enters this new chapter with three children?

 

Information Posts

Wonderful News for Margaret as she announces over on Mummy's Space that she is about to join our Multiples club!

Over on Twins Tiaras and Tantrums Lisa reflects on why she didn't realize she was in labour. The whole pregnancy and birth thing can feel a little surreal at the time, I can see just why Lisa reacted as she did.

Eleanor who blogs at 2 of Everything reflects back on her birth story. A gripping read that brought many memories back of my own births and I'm sure will do the same for you too. 

If you have multiples coming up to weaning age, see how Emma from Crazy with Twins worked out her twins were ready for solids.

Read how child led potty training of Twins can be stress free from Kristen at Caution! Kids at Play 

Kristen from Caution! Twins at Play shows how to ensure our children keep the play space tidy! It will take patience and input from you but could be worth it in the long run.

Are you part of a real life multiples group? Joanne from Trouble Doubled is but finds her local group under threat. See why she values her group and is pleading to keep it open.

 

Reflections on a first term at school

Mari from Maris World updates us on her twin girls as they start school, noting their differences, happy moments and tricky times. Something in here I think we can all relate to 

Michelle at Mummy from the Heart shares her concerns for the twins from their first term at school, different characters really do react differently to situations as Michelle finds out. She would love to hear from anyone else who has been through early school days and opted to separate their twins into different classes.

Anthea from Blue Bear Wood has twin girls who are so sure of their identity; check out their lovely response when Mummy asks one to look in the mirror at her new school uniform

 

Twin Differences

Even at 6 months different personalities are showing at Crazy with Twins, Emma takes a fun look at development through her babies eyes.

Stacey at Five's a Fellowship looks at the same phenomena of the startling differences in her twins already, my triplets are all very different too, is this your experience?

Even at 6 months different personalities are showing at Crazy with Twins, Emma takes a fun look at development through her babies' eyes.

Amie relishes the differences in her twins and offers 8 helpful steps on her blog Triple T Mum to ensure your multiples feel like individuals.

Funny Post:

I had to include this one for the fun factor, things you could only say to multiples from Crazy with Twins

Never Forgotten

I must just finish with a little mention for Multiple Mummy who is usually part of this Carnival. I think everyone by now must know the terrible situation with Kerry in Hospital, it felt only right to give her a mention here and also thank New Mum on Line for her memorable #Healing for Kerry night on twitter and linky. Kerry we hope you will be back to join us here again in the future.

 

Looking Forwards

I have 2 lovely volunteers to host the next Multiples Mayhem. Kristen from  and Lisa from  I'll leave you to agree the order and dates ladies which should take us well into 2013, thank you for offering and I hope you enjoy hosting as much as I have.

Can I also put in a mention for the Multiples Mayhem facebook page. If you are not already following please do. It has been newly set up by the ever efficient Joanne at Double Trouble and it would be great to see it supported as a forum for us all to share and learn all things multiple related. 

 

Wishing you all Happy Christmas Preparations this month and thank you for taking the time to participate and share here on the Carnival.

 

 

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Please share our family farm holidays, I'd be so proud

Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

Coombe Mill

"Tales from the farmers wife" shares the funny and interesting happenings on our lovely holiday farm with Farmer Nick and our 6 children. A behind the scenes look on balancing family, farming, the holiday business and cooking for all. 


Grab the badge & join the linky for outdoor fun Sat - Thurs

Country Kids from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall


Twinkl Resources

Fun and free high quality printable resources for kids! Includes games, crafts, puzzles, colouring sheets and much more!

Want to advertise?

If you think you have a relevant business that will be of benefit to the users of this site, Submit an Advert. All adverts are manually reviewed before they become visible on the site.


Submit Advert

Discounts you may like


Activity Toys Direct

Proud to have our Education pages developed with twinkl

Twinkl Primary School Resources

Official Forest Blogger

”Official

Finalist 2014 Winner 2013 and 2012

MAD Blog Awards
MAD Blog Awards
MAD Blog Awards

Thank You!

FINALIST BiB 2014 SOCIALMEDIANOMINATE ME BiB 2013 SOCIALMEDIA NOMINATE ME BiB 2013 LIFESTYLE

Best Family Friendly Travel Destination & Best Family Accommodation 2013 and 2014

Loved by Parents Gold Family Friendly Accommodation Loved by Parents Gold Family Travel Destination
Loved By Parents Winner Best Family Friendly Travel Destination Loved By Parents Winner Best Family Accomodation
Loved By Parents Runner Up Blogger of the Year 2012 Blogger of the year runner up 2011

UK Self Catering Holidays

Mumsnet Best Self Catering HolidaysMumsnet Best Self Catering Holidays

  Mumsnet Best

Coombe Mill Holidays SBS Winner 2011

SBS Winner

Coombe Mill Holidays Winner 12.6.13



Page Rank

Ebuzzing - Top Blogs Ebuzzing - Top Blogs - Parenting

Follow Coombe Mill

Coombe Mill Kids Perspective

Kids Perspective from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

Kids Perspective from Coombe Mill Family Farm Holidays Cornwall

Month List


15% discount at Mai Tui with Coombe Mill


mumsnet

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